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Oh so humble?

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Negotiation touches every part of our lives. Relationships in business and in our personal lives are negotiated. And the skills to do it effectively can often mean the difference between getting what you want or losing out. You don’t get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate!

In the first section of the book, How to be a Great Negotiator, written by property economist, investor and developer Neville Berkowitz, the characteristic traits of a great negotiator are explored in short, bite-sized nuggets of advice.

Over the next 132 days, we will bring you the traits needed to succeed at the art of negotiating.

(Courtesy of PersonalEmpowerment.co)

57 Humility

When you achieve great success, a high profile, ascend to a position of authority, or when praise, acknowledgment, or accolades for your accomplishments are accorded to you by others, an attitude of humility is generally better than smug gloating or arrogant pride.

Genuine humility is an attractive quality and an effective counter-balance and response to any egotism shown by the other party. Genuine humility perfectly combines with talent, success, and strength. It is also a sign of good character and maturity. It is what Theodore Roosevelt meant when he said, “Talk softly, but carry a big stick.”

But you don’t want to confuse humility with false humility, which can seem another form of pride. You don’t want to pretend to be so humble that it comes across as pretentious or annoying. An Israeli prime minister famously reprimanded one such person, saying, “Don’t be so humble, you’re not that great.” You also don’t want to appear so humble that it seems like weakness, lack of confidence, or low self-esteem.

Genuine humility is a quiet strength and a steady presence focused on the person in front of you or on the task at hand. Genuine humility is primarily concerned with doing what must be done, rather than getting credit or recognition.

Great negotiators understand the potential strengths and weaknesses of both humility and bravado; and, for all the above reasons, they choose to err on the side of humility.


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