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Why you can’t change a “heart” negotiator

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Negotiation touches every part of our lives. Relationships in business and in our personal lives are negotiated. And the skills to do it effectively can often mean the difference between getting what you want or losing out. You don’t get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate!

In the second section of the book, How to be a Great Negotiator, written by property economist, investor and developer Neville Berkowitz, the 26 different personality traits of negotiators you are likely to encounter in the course of your negotiating career are identified. Over the next few weeks we will recommend ways of dealing with each type of negotiator.

(Courtesy of PersonalEmpowerment.co)

12 The emotional negotiator

Emotional/intuitive negotiators follow their feelings and trust their gut, sometimes overriding practical or logical considerations and facts in making key decisions. This intuitive approach accesses a nonlinear, right-brained intelligence that is different from the conventional business approach. Not everyone can or should operate in this way. But these types are leading with their strong suit in trusting that mysterious “sixth sense” and the messages of their emotions more than they trust their left brain’s analysis of the facts.

Emotional/intuitive negotiators tend to be more emotionally present in general. They are tuning into a different frequency than most negotiators you will meet. You will find that while you can debate certain matters with them in a negotiation, you can’t debate or change their feelings and intuitions about the matter at hand. Their feelings and intuitions are the “truth” for them, and any attempt to argue or persuade them to go against these “truths” will simply alienate them from you.

All you can do is make your best case and accept that whatever their gut tells them, and whatever decision they make on this basis, is right for them. If their decision isn’t in your favour, graciously accept it. And if their decision benefits you, congratulate them on their well-honed instincts!


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